relationship advice from a person who cant even keep their own relationship?
i love giving relationship advice. i think im really good at it. people seem to think the same too. i help them out when theyre depressed from a breakup or are in trouble with their relationship. it usually goes well. for some reason it doesnt work out for me. my relationship crashes and burns and i fall into a depression/rage. its pretty sad that i cant help myself isnt it???
not all relationships are ment to be forever but still. what do you think of me and my situation?
Relationships aren’t as easy as putting advice to a problem. This being because most advice is book advice…it’s for the ideal relationship. But the fact is, every single person and every single relationship on earth is different and not all advice can match up 100% with the problem a couple is having.
For instance: In general we say, if you’re feeling uncomfortable with your significant other’s temper problem, talk to them about your concerns and try to make them understand where you’re coming from. This is text book advice. Ideally…this would work for everyone. First couple: The man easily raises his voice, slams doors, hits the walls…scares the woman senseless. So one day, she sits him down and confronts him without being offensive, just as the advice tells her to do. But he’s in denial and gets defensive and says she doesn’t know what she’s talking about and starts saying that there just something wrong with her that she’s trying to cover up. Second couple: The man is the same way. The woman, again, sits him down and confronts him…tells him how he scares her when he gets angry and tells him of all the stuff he does. Realization hits him and he apologizes and from then on, makes an effort to get better.
All advice has to be tweaked here and there to meet the needs of the specific couple and individual. Even here, we give advice…but i by no means think our advice is followed to the letter. The asker tweaks it where it needs to be tweaked to fit his/her needs with his/her relationship and significant other.
June 17th, 2010 at 7:55 pm
I think you have a great head on your shoulders.
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June 17th, 2010 at 8:35 pm
It’s easy to give really good advice to other people, but it can be hard to follow your own advice. I think you should try and be single for a little while(like a few months) before getting into another relationship. Have fun with your friends and forget about serious relationships for a bit.
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Story of my life
June 17th, 2010 at 8:50 pm
You need to give time to yourself, instead of giving advice, focus on yourself. You have accepted that some relationships fail, but you need to be more positive in which the idea of a relationship is a sign of unity and symbolism of love and devotion. Email me about the situation, and I will give you the best advice. Simply put, there isn’t enough information to assist you, so email me.
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June 17th, 2010 at 8:58 pm
consider the advice you have given to others. if it fits what is going on your life, follow it. or find someone that you can ask advice from. and decide which advice you want to try.
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June 17th, 2010 at 9:43 pm
I am 36 and I can relate to you… I left my husband almost 2 years ago … I am great giving advice and standing by to support others but when it comes to me I just do not get it !!! I keep telling myself people come for a reason, a season or a lifetime… Stay positive… do not even think of the whole crash and burn… take things day by day…. dont read into things too much and things will change. I have worked out that you only get back the positive thoughts you put in… just enjoy your life day by day and things will fall into place when you least expect it.
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June 17th, 2010 at 10:24 pm
Relationships aren’t as easy as putting advice to a problem. This being because most advice is book advice…it’s for the ideal relationship. But the fact is, every single person and every single relationship on earth is different and not all advice can match up 100% with the problem a couple is having.
For instance: In general we say, if you’re feeling uncomfortable with your significant other’s temper problem, talk to them about your concerns and try to make them understand where you’re coming from. This is text book advice. Ideally…this would work for everyone. First couple: The man easily raises his voice, slams doors, hits the walls…scares the woman senseless. So one day, she sits him down and confronts him without being offensive, just as the advice tells her to do. But he’s in denial and gets defensive and says she doesn’t know what she’s talking about and starts saying that there just something wrong with her that she’s trying to cover up. Second couple: The man is the same way. The woman, again, sits him down and confronts him…tells him how he scares her when he gets angry and tells him of all the stuff he does. Realization hits him and he apologizes and from then on, makes an effort to get better.
All advice has to be tweaked here and there to meet the needs of the specific couple and individual. Even here, we give advice…but i by no means think our advice is followed to the letter. The asker tweaks it where it needs to be tweaked to fit his/her needs with his/her relationship and significant other.
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June 17th, 2010 at 10:54 pm
It’s much easier to look at somebody else’s problem and help them out than it is to look at your own. When you’re working on one’s own problems, it’s difficult because one knows how they feel about it on their side, but usually cannot relate to the feelings of the other. On the outside, it’s easier to make decisions because the problem at hand doesn’t directly affect you.
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June 17th, 2010 at 10:59 pm
Ive had the same problem before. I am great at giving advice to a friend in a particular situation with their BF but have had troubles keeping my own relationships last. It doesnt reflect on you. Your friends are presenting you with a problem. And you give advice for that problem. Doesn’t mean that problem ever happens in your relationships. You have different problems and have no one with good answers to turn to. Thats all it means.
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June 17th, 2010 at 11:19 pm
ha ha! where in the same shoes…
It is really hard to put in to actions the advices that you had given to your friends. What I can say is that, when you are giving advices to your friends you are using your mind and advice what you know is right, aight? Then do the same thing for yourself… use your mind and do what you know is right.
I will share to you a website which has lots of articles with love and relationships. Try reading the articles. This might help you and gives you more information in dealing with love matters. Just copy the link below and paste it in your browser. =)
http://www.selfhelpmagazine.com/article/love
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http://www.selfhelpmagazine.com/